


I Can't Fuck That Man With a Gun

by samsarapine



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Blanket Permission, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-03-14
Updated: 2010-03-14
Packaged: 2017-10-07 23:50:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/70534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/samsarapine/pseuds/samsarapine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Unrequited lust between a demon with a gun and a priest with a gun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can't Fuck That Man With a Gun

**Author's Note:**

> Filk based on "You Can't Get a Man With a Gun".

  
  
  
**Entry tags:** |   
[7thnight_smut](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/7thnight_smut), [fic](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/fic), [hakkai/gojyo](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/hakkai/gojyo), [lyrics](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/lyrics), [nc-17](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/nc-17), [rec](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/rec), [saiyuki](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/saiyuki), [sanzo](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/sanzo), [yakumo](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/tag/yakumo)  
  
---|---  
  
 

**Title:** I Can't Fuck That Man With a Gun  
**Author:** [](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/profile)[**samsarapine**](http://samsarapine.livejournal.com/)  
**Rating:** NC-17  
**Character(s)/Pairing(s):** Yakumo/Sanzo  
**Warnings/Spoilers:** Song lyrics, explicit sexual fantasies.   
**Summary:** Unrequited lust between a demon with a gun and a priest with a gun.  
**Word Count:** About 1,300  
**Disclaimer:** Yakumo, Genjyo Sanzo and all associated characters from the Saiyuki universe are the property of Minekura Kazuya and those to whom she has licensed her creations. No copyright infringement is intended. The author is making no profit from this story.  
**Notes:** Here's the first of two hump day reveals for the stories that I've written for the [Saiyuki Kink Meme IV](http://istumen.livejournal.com/4008.html). Both of them are short and silly, but were loads of fun to write. This one was for the prompt: I would be beyond happy if someone wrote Yakumo!The erotic musical, featuring Yakumo and Sanzo; based on a spectacular dream I had.

 

(Sung to the tune of "You Can't Get a Man With a Gun," from _Annie, Get Your Gun_.)

I Can't Fuck That Man With a Gun

 

YAKUMO:  
Surrounded by children, no adults come my way,  
Some say I'm heroic -- I'm not.  
I think of the tightness and the lightness all day,  
Of a certain blond monk on my cock.   
I hush all my moaning -- at night, no kids are roaming  
So I wank 'til the morning sun,  
But all I get is chafing and blue balls that start aching -   
Oh, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

SANZO:  
When I'm cleaning my pistol,  
It's clear to me as crystal  
I want that youkai's cock up my bum.  
Then my thoughts start a'churning  
And my prick starts in a'burning  
No, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

BOTH:  
With a gun, with a gun,  
No, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

YAKUMO:  
If I start to thinkin'  
Of that Sanzo houshi dinkin'  
I get hard as a streetwalker's john.  
But if I pulled my cock out,  
He'd surely shoot my nuts off  
So I can't fuck the priest  
From the east like a beast--  
No, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

SANZO:  
Some days while we're driving  
I feel my hard cock striving  
For the feel of his youkai tongue.  
But then Goku'll annoy me,  
And I lose my hard-on wholly,  
Oh, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

YAKUMO:  
I bet those three jerks bone him,  
But they'll never lick his hole rim  
Like I would if I could have some.  
Oh I'd make him forget them,  
'Cuz my tongue's an anal wet gem  
No, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

BOTH:  
With a gun, with a gun,  
No, I can't fuck that man with a gun.

But one day I'm hoping  
To see his hot face scoping  
Out my arse by the setting sun,  
Then I'll stop and I'll jump him,  
And deeply plow my cock in,  
And he'll howl like a skunk  
Or a punk full of spunk,  
And we'll fuck all night long with our guns. (reprise)


End file.
